Mumbai - 3

Going to Mumbai for the 3rd time soon. Very soon, hopefully. And then to Thane (have I said that before?). Then to Pune. And then to Hyderabad, Bangalore, Chennai before coming back to Ahmedabad. It's a long long journey on which I am going..!

And I have taken a pledge to only use trains and buses for the next 3 months. No flights. No matter how much that delays my plans. Let's see how that works out. For boy, do I have to travel :-)

What to do? What to do?

I have so many thoughts in my mind. And writing is what helps me organize them. And yet, right now, I don't have the patience to just sit for even half an hour and write stuff out. And I think I need days to clear my mind out!

Arghhh. I am hating this particular period of time.

Chuck Lorre Productions #353

I have long believed that we as human beings are genetically inclined to elevate and worship those of us we deem to be very beautiful or very talented. We do this because we are somehow comforted by our adoration. It makes us feel good. As children we sleep beneath the images of movie, TV, music and sports stars and dream about the mystery and grandeur of their lives. As adults, the posters come off the wall, only to be replaced by a steady, noxious stream of tabloid culture. But perhaps most enjoyable of all is watching the fall from grace. Nothing beats a good ol’ public crucifixion. Especially when it’s self-inflicted. My theory for why this is considered entertainment is, again, a genetic one. DNA, even if it’s mediocre, wants to ensure its own survival. The existence of superior DNA is viewed as a threat. When beautiful and talented people screw up, we can’t help but feel that this somehow improves the chances for our mediocre descendants to eat meat. In other words, evolution my ass. 

Here I go again!

Growth, in India, has not been equitable. In fact I am not even sure that even the middle class is growing. I am not sure whether growth, by itself, is a good thing to aim at. What is growth? What is development? Is all development good? I don't have answers to these questions.

Doing a regular job is easy. All one needs to do is shut one's mind to everything else and just work. I worked for 3 years in a large multi-national corporation that paid me good money. And all I did was work at the office and have fun with friends there. I stopped seeing the 10-odd beggars that would knock at my car's windows on the way to office. I stopped feeling that tinge of discomfort when I saw 10 year olds selling magazines at the red light, barefooted, in the scorching heat of May. I had stopped seeing the silent cry of the child playing at the red light with a stick, seemingly oblivious of the world around it.

Now, on the verge of leaving IIM-A, removed from the corporate life for two years, I am seeing this again. And I want to do something about this. There are so many things that can be done. I can help teach. I can help them work. I can train them. I can work to get them their rights. I can help them make their way back to their hometowns and villages and make sure that they can earn enough over there. The thing I do is not important. The manner I do it in is important.

I have studied here for two years and I want to make use of what I might have learnt. I believe that every person has a place in the value chain. I want to find my correct place and work from there. Be it in the field, in an office at a desk or meeting people and presenting ideas. I want to explore myself, more than anything else, and see where I fit and then hopefully, find the courage to do that.

I want to be realistic. I am still not free of the fear of my future. I am still not free from wanting to live comfortably. Maybe that will happen, someday. But that is not my aim. My aim is not to live like a saint helping people out of pure selflessness. That is not who I am at this moment. Whether I become that or not is a different thing altogether. But I want to start on this process of helping people and finding myself. And I am hoping that I will find the strength to do this for long.

And that is why I am starting on a small journey. It was tough to even decide to take this journey. Because for this I had to fight many many fears. The first was the fear of missing out on opportunities. The opportunity to work at the world's leading consulting firms. The opportunity to work in India's biggest corporate houses. The opportunity to beat my chest and say, "Hey, I am your daddy!". And with that I had to give up the 'respect' (read ego-boost) that comes with getting a job there. And I was still unable to do that completely. I still sat for one firm that I didn't really want to but just couldn't leave it. In hindsight though, I am glad I didn't get the offer!

However, I have taken up a job at Microsoft India for the role of a Program Manager. They have been supportive, and are keen to help me experiment. And I also know that they work in areas that I want to experiment in. Hopefully, there will be some synergy there. And I liked the people. Plus, I am not that strong, yet, to take the leap. I hope I find it over the next 6 months or so.

I will keep updating as to what I am doing and where. The first step, as mentioned in the last post, is a small fun meet with people from all over the subcontinent in a nice little retreat in the Sahyadris. These people are from all walks of life. Parents, teachers, philosophers, yogis, doctors, artists, nomads, students, experimentalists, you name it. I have no idea what we will do there, or discuss, but it should be fun! Already I am part of mails that are talking of homeschooling, cooking in the mud, going for treks at night, playing holi with poems, sex, letting the mind flow, unlearning, yog, siddhi medicine and so much more. And we are going to do all that. I hope you know what you are missing. Try it out when it happens next year.

Wish me luck :-)

Learning Societies Unconference

I am super excited! I am going to the LSUnconference 2012 near Thane from Feb 28- March 4th. Will add more details later. But just had to post this :-)

This is what I am going for: LSUnconference 2012!

O Me! O Life!

Shakespeare said:

All the world's a stage;
And all the men and women merely players

 Walt Whitman said:

O ME! O life!... of the questions of these recurring;  
Of the endless trains of the faithless—of cities fill’d with the foolish;  
Of myself forever reproaching myself, (for who more foolish than I, and who more faithless?)  
Of eyes that vainly crave the light—of the objects mean—of the struggle ever renew’d;  
Of the poor results of all—of the plodding and sordid crowds I see around me; Of the empty and useless years of the rest—with the rest me intertwined;  
The question, O me! so sad, recurring—What good amid these, O me, O life?  
  
                                               Answer

That you are here—that life exists, and identity;
That the powerful play goes on, and you will contribute a verse.

What a difference in perspective. Need I say more?

PS: Dead Poet's Society Rocks!

Taking a different path - Part 2

Just continuing with my last post with more endeavors in education.

6. Pratham Books - http://www.prathambooks.org/

A Book In Every Child's Hand
At Pratham Books, we believe that every child has the right to enjoy good books.  And we believe they should have stories set in surroundings familiar to them and in a language close to their culture. We believe that to make books accessible to every child, the price points have to be very low. Pratham Books is a brand of story books as Indian as the children who read them. Our dream is to see a country where every child wants to read, is able to read, and has something good to read.

7. Dr. Reddy's Foundation - http://www.drreddysfoundation.org/

Set up in 1996, Dr. Reddy’s Foundation (DRF) is a non-profit partner of Dr. Reddy’s Laboratories. Driven by its belief in the inherent motivation and capacity of the human being for progress – given the appropriate and adequate environment – DRF innovates and tries out novel concepts that are continuously refined and scaled up to cover larger groups of disadvantaged populations.

8. Gandhi Fellowship - http://www.gandhifellowship.org/

Through a deeply transformative process of self-discovery and personal change, the Fellows are encouraged to delve deeper, to discover their passions and to convert their private dreams into a public reality.

9. Smile Foundation - http://www.smilefoundationindia.org

Under education, Smile Foundation strives to promote and catalyze universal education among children from underprivileged section of society. The aim being that education should lead to change not only in the amount of knowledge gained but also in the abilities to do, to think and to acquire habits, skills and attitude which characterize an individual who is socially accepted and adjusted. The term universalizsation includes universal enrolment, universal retention and universal achievement of an acceptable level of reading, writing and arithmetic. We at Smile believe that Quality Education is key to overcoming poverty in a single generation. And it is also fundamental in creating a future for human security, community development and national progress. It is an enormous challenge. It is also an immense opportunity!

10.  Doosra Dashak - http://www.doosradashak.in

With reference to persons of 11-20 age group, DD aims to channelize immense energy of these young boys and girls towards community development and nation building. DD programme works with the following objectives:

• To meet their basic learning needs and to relate learning to life, work and environment;
• To equip them for adolescence and family life through improvement in their understanding of issues in health/reproductive health and making them aware about HIV /AIDS;
• To create an awareness about the underlying causes of socio-economic and gender inequality;
• To cater livelihood related issues by enhancing vocational and life skills;
• To harness their energies for nation building through creation of cadres who may provide educated, informed and responsible leadership;
• To create a cadre of adolescents to work towards securing people’s rights and to steadfastly pursue the constitutional postulates of national integration, democracy and secularism;
• To employ science and technology for improving the lives of the people.

More in the next post!

Taking a different path

I have been reading up a bit on alternate educational methodologies and organisations that people have started in this domain. It is important to understand that these people are going down this road purely because they believe that the schooling system that is so ubiquitous today is in fact the root of the problem that education all over the world, and certainly India, suffers from.

According to some sources, the school system of education, where children are "taught" only began in the 17th century in parts of Prussia where a quick turnaround time was desired in training military-ready adolescents. It was, as you might have guessed, a pure assembly line operation, which has invaded almost every educational system today. Hence, these people's attempt to reboot the system, start again from the point where our ancient forefathers had left off at. I won't describe that here, for I myself am still struggling to understand it. But I will give a few pointers to people and organisations that are doing that.

1. Educate for Life - http://www.educateforlife.org.uk/

We built Hunar Ghar in one of the poorest and most isolated parts of India. We provide a high quality academic and skill-based education for free, support community development with reforestation work, women’s groups and more, and also promote wider changes in the Indian education system. What we do is crucial to enabling children and the community to live fulfilling lives in a way that they value, none of which would be possible without the great work of our team in India and the recognition and generous support of people like you!

And here is a short video on it.

2. Shikshantar - The People's Institute for rethinking education and development - http://www.swaraj.org/shikshantar/

Shikshantar is an applied research institute dedicated to catalyzing radical systemic transformation of education in order to facilitate Swaraj - development throughout India.

Person to contact: Manish Jain - Call phone number given on the website. He does not keep a cell.

3. Imlee Mahuaa - http://imleemahuaa.org/

Imlee Mahuaa Naee Taaleem Centre For Learning (we have a rather long name, don't we ? ) is the name of the little primary school where we all belong. Our school is housed in the Ghotul among the fields and trees of Balenga Para village in Bastar's Kondagaon tehsil. We get our name from Imlee (tamarind) and Mahuaa (butter tree) the favorite trees in our region that fortunately no one seems to axe down! We love to collect the Mahuaa flowers for our mums and feast on the tamarind pods when they ripen twice a year. Our Didis and Bhaiyaas tell us that Naee Taaleem is a friendly way of learning that is especially useful for village children - and it was first thought of by Gandhiji. Anyway, we just call our school Imlee Mahuaa!!

Person to contact - Prayaag Joshi

4. Center for Learning - http://www.centreforlearning.org/index.php

CFL is an education centre with a passionate commitment to quality in education.We offer personally meaningful and socially responsible education as opposed to mere schooling. 

The face of CFL is the children's learning centre, an alternative education centre for children between 3 and 16 years. The heart of CFL is a serious conceptual and hands-on enquiry into quality education. We attempt to show how meaningful education can empower all individuals, including the disadvantaged groups, rather than make them unwitting collaborators in their own exploitation. 

We work with children, parents, interested individuals and groups and organizations from all backgrounds – regardless of their ability to pay.

Person to contact - Dr. Gurveen Kaur

5. Manzil - A youth empowerment and learning centre - http://manzil.in/

We are a non-profit organization providing a community and resources for local youth from low-income backgrounds to learn, teach, be creative, and see the world in new ways. Located in Khan Market, we serve those living in the servant quarters and one-room tenements that cohabitate this affluent area of New Delhi. 

While a website can do its best to inform, nothing can convey the distinctive atmosphere of Manzil like a visit. We invite you to take a look around our electronic space, but also to drop by 13 Khan Market to see what we do and what we’re all about.

Person to contact - Ravi Gulati

This a small list to start off with. But a good one all the same. And a very important fact. All these initiatives are keen on people coming to them and experiencing their way of life by staying with them for a few days, at the very least. And if someone's interest gets piqued, they can join for a longer stint!

Hoping that these initiatives continue and find all the support that they need.

There You Go!

Copying from a lovely blog by a pretty interesting guy! Enjoy, think, reflect and share!

Fingers Crossed

After a long long time I got the happy feeling in helping out a friend. It was just a fleeting sensation, but it was satisfying all the same. I wonder what has happened, I used to get that feeling so much just 2-3 years ago. And now it has become so rare that I can't remember the last time I felt like that, I just get the feeling that it was quite some time back.

I need this feeling. How much it kept me going is coming back now. Rushing in. I need to get out of this bubble I have built around me. The bubble of selecting a career, thinking of my future and my responsibilities. It has been 2 years here in Ahmedabad already. And all I did was look ahead and not look around, it seems. Well, better late than never!

Fingers crossed.

Kaam bada ya Naam?

All your life you are spoon-fed one single message: You are destined for great things. For that, you toil hard. Study as much as possible. Play as many sports as possible. Learn as many musical instruments as possible. You do everything that would make you look good on paper. You get into the top institutes of your chosen profession. You end up among the toppers there too. And you are on the cusp of getting placed in a great organization as well. Life's pretty good, eh?

Had that been the complete story, had that been all that there is to life, I would not have been writing this post! Obviously, there is a but.

Let's talk for a moment about how one of these trophy kids* decides which companies to target in the campus placements.

Almost all campuses have a day basis. Stripping it of all terminologies, it usually means that companies come to campus in the decreasing order of their pay scales. Now imagine the thought process of our kid. And imagine the environment within the campus. Almost everyone is targeting these highest paying jobs. Why? Is it just the money?

Probably not. I feel something at least as important as the money is the prestige value. A person who is expected to crack a first day offer (and by expected I mean good grades and a good pedigree) will be distraught if he doesn't, not because he won't get the monies, but because there is loss of face within the peer group. So the kid gives it all to get into one of those firms, usually not caring whether he is interested in that job at all.

The key word here is usually. Most of the times, students convince themselves that it is indeed their ambition to get into consulting or finance. They believe in it precisely because they want to (or even have to) believe in it. Else how would they justify their getting into these firms? Few like saying it is just for the money. And even fewer will admit that it is the social status attached to the job that attracts them. Edit: Not that there is anything wrong with it. The only question to ask is are you being completely honest with yourself?

And there are a few who passionately believe that this chosen stream is really their calling. Nothing better than that, is there?

But every so often, one or two of these students will question this mindset. They will want to explore other opportunities. Those which will not pay as much and definitely are not as highly regarded by this peer group.  What goes on, then, in the mid of such guys? How do they decide what to do? How do they resist the lure of money & respect and try something which might give them more satisfaction. And they don't even know whether it will give them satisfaction? Should the institute help such people out? Should the peer group be more understanding? Are our placement systems completely apathetic to the problems of such people?

How does this person decide ki Kaam bada ya naam? I will try and answer that in the next post.

Edit: Writing the next part of the post is turning out to be a bother.. and was keeping me from putting up other stuff. Putting it off till when the mood strikes me!

A Nice Pair

While I had heard the song, Emptiness (Tune mere jaana) quite a long back, I was unaware of the existence of the female version (Maine Mere Jaana), which is just as good..! Posting both.

Tune Mere Jaana
- Rohan Rathore

Ho love of mine..

with a song and a wine..

You’re harsh and divine..

like truths and a lie..

but the tale ends not here..

I’ve nothing to fear..

for my love is yell of giving an hold on…

in the bright emptiness..

in the room full of it..

is a cruel mistress ho ho o…

I feel the sunrise..

that nest all hollowness..

or i have the way to go in that cold…

And i feel so lonely yea..

There s a better place from this emptiness..

And i’m so lonely yea..

There s a better place from this emptiness..

yei yei yei ya….

Aa.. aa.. aa…..

Tune mere jaana..

Kabhi nahi jana..

Ishq mera dard mera.. haaye…

Tune mere jaana..

Kabhi nahi jana..

Ishq mera dard mera …

Aashiq teraaa..

Bheed mein khoya rehta hai.

Jaane jahaan a..

Puchho toh itna kehta hai..

And i feel so lonely yea..

There s a better place from this emptiness..

And i’m so lonely yea..

Maine Mere Jaana

- Kaushi Diwakar

Tu Aaja
Tu aaja

Mujhko meri sazaa toh suna jaa
Woh aahein haan woh aansu...
mere hisse ke mujhko rula jaa

sapne tere saare jinme main rehti thi
tukde ban ke mere
Zakhm seene me kar gaye ho

maine mere jaana kyun nahi jaana
ishq tera, dard tera
Maine Mere Jaana Kyun Nahi Jaana

Ishq Tera, Dard Tera
Akeli akeli 
reh gayi bin tere yun akeli
main tadpoo'n ya taarsoo'n
Ya chali aau'n main paas tere
itni tanhai hai zindagi kho gayi

baatein karne saari aa rahi hoon tujhse hi
maine mere jaana ab hai jaana.....
ishq tera dard tera haaye
maine mere jaaana ab hai jaana
ishq tera dard tera

tu jo gaya......
haal ye mera rehta hai
dil ye mera aaa..aaa....
khud se hi tanha rehta hai

and i feel too lonely yeah...
thats a better place than this
Emptiness

and I'm too lonely
thats a better place than this
Emptiness

Surprised?

I hear a voice,
It is she
The one whom I have been
Waiting to see
She comes up close
And whispers in my ear
Looks at my eyes
Tells me not to shed tears
She cradles my face
And sings me a song
Of sweet memories from
A time long gone
But just as I start
To feel a bit safe
I wake up and find
It was my TV for God's sake!

Foolish Desires

It's New Year and everyone is partying. Celebrating with people whose company they enjoy. The campus is full of happy people drunk in the spirits of friendship. But there are some, who even in the midst of this crowd are feeling all alone. There are some at the back of whose minds is a hope. A foolish hope, maybe. They are waiting for that call, or that message which they know will not come. They are all pining for it. Checking their phones every 10 minutes. Looking at their inboxes, or their chats, or their facebook pages.

But it won't come. He knows that person is out there, chatting with someone else. Right now. How then can this person feel inebriated in this atmosphere? If only wishes could come true. Just this once. And just then, a couple he knows walks in. And he has to wish them a Happy New Year, drinking in his tears, putting on that face he has mastered by now.

Happy New Year folks.

Two Old Verses

Found two printouts which used to be on my wall in my cube at Adobe.

This first one is from Scrubs. Fell in love with these lines and the music then. Couldn't decipher a few words though.

Any minute now

My ship is coming in

I'll keep checking the horizon

I'll stand on the bowl*

Feel the waves come crashing

Come crashing down, down, down on me

And you say, be still, my love

Open up your heart, let the light shine in

Don't you understand,

I already have a plan,

I am waiting for my real life to begin

My real life to begin

Don't you understand

I already have a plan

I am waiting for my real life to begin

On a clear day, I can see, see a very long way...!

It obviously talks of death, which is a key theme in the series, but it seems to speak of death metaphorically too, hinting to the lows we deal with everyday, and how we look forward to be rescued, have hope, for something new to begin. 

That's what I think anyways.

The second one actually came from a college & work colleague, Meenal. She gave this to me on my birthday along with a nice beer bar cutout which people fought over to keep when I left Adobe :D

It's your birthday, so don't feel down;

Don't think bad stuff and frown;

Your life should be filled with mirth;

Just look what you've done since your birth.

You started out really small,

Now you're really filled out and tall.

In the beginning you would just cry,

Now you can laugh if you try.

You've done quite well since your start,

So as you grow older take heart;

Keep up the good work and don't be a jerk;

Stay happy till you're an old fart.

                       :-)

       Belated Happy Birthday!